The Master Cleanse Chronicles (Days 4,5, and 6)

Current mood:anxious

Hey guys!  Sorry I haven’t written in a few days.  Things have been a little hectic on this end.  My husband and I have been looking for a house and it has been crazy lately.  So things are back to normal…sort of.  LOL

I didn’t take my salt water flush on day four because when I took my Senna Leaf Tea the night before, I didn’t get anything but bad cramps the next day.  So since nothing happened, I wasn’t about to take the SWF and add insult to injury. That would have been WAY too much on my system.  Plus I had to take my car to the shop cause it’s acting like IT’S on the Master Cleanse right now.

My right leg started cramping up on day four as well.  I wasn’t sure what that was about, so I looked it up online.  The only thing I came up with is that “my body is experiencing the release of toxins”…Ummm okay.  Well hopefully the toxins hurry it on up.

I actually finished my lemonade with ease on day four.  Mostly because I didn’t take my customary nap, so I had tons of drinking time.

Day 5 was pretty much the same as day four, but that whole superhero sense of smell thing that people talk about kicked in.  I smelled EVERYTHING.  It was a little off-putting, to say the least.  I could smell everything people ate….even if it was hours ago.  I could smell my husband’s lunch bag in his car like HOURS later.  It was crazy.  Plus I live in an aparment, so imagine what that’s like.  My right leg was still cramping on day 5.  I went back to the shop where I dropped my car off and the guys were like, “Ummm, what is that?  Vodka and cranberry?”, to which I replied,”Oh, definitely something MUCH stronger.”  I carry my lemonade around in one of those 1/2 gallon jug things that resemble the office water cooler, so I’m quite sure they thought I was an alcoholic. Oh well.

Didn’t do the laxative tea or the SWF today (day 6) because my husband and I were going out to look at houses.   Clearly, that would not have worked out.  I really can’t see how people do this cleanse and go to work.  But in any event, there was no cramping in the legs.  Maybe it’s because I didn’t drink the SWF or the tea, but I couldn’t risk needing that kind of a bathroom break.  Plus most unoccupied houses are winterized this time of year, and I don’t think I would have been able to stop myself from using one of them is the need were to arise.  Better safe than sorry, right?

I can’t believe I’ve made it to the halfway point.  I’m very proud of myself, I must say.  This cleanse takes a TON of willpower, but I can’t stop this far in.  If I do, what was all the cramping for?  The nasty SWF?  The $10 bottles of maple syrup?(which I’m wondering if I’ll ever use again.)

Food smells good everywhere I go, but I don’t have the desire for any.  I mean, I want to eat, but I don’t want to eat.  It’ll be hard to start back eating again.  I can understand why people go vegan after this.  You really think twice about what you put in your mouth after such a stringent regimen.  I’ve decided a few things while on the cleanse:

1.  I will probably drink more water.  The “water-cooler” jugs are your daily reccommended amount of water per day, and I suppose if I drank enough water, I wouldn’t get into trouble with foods and overeating.

2.  I plan on eating what ever I please on the weekends.  It’s my belief that people fail to eat right because most diets are way too rigid.  I figure if I allow myself the weekends to do what I want, I’ll be more likely to eat right during the week.

3. I’m going to try and only eat things that are natural during the week.  Things that are as nature intended them.  Not doing that is probably why most people have internal problems (gastrointestinal ones, I mean, but maybe more).  If you eat what God meant for you to eat in the first place, maybe you’ll feel better in life.

Okay.  I’m done philosophizing now.  I’m bitter cause I talked to my parents and they’re at Cracker Barrel….Jerks….LOL.  I’m kidding.  I told them we should have a celebretory lunch on Saturday because my husband and I will be done fasting and we’ll probably have our house by then (pray for us)

I’m still hoping this will all be funny in a week….we’ll see.

PS  I’m craving assorted types of eggs today…random, huh?


Posted on November 3, 2011, in The Master Cleanse and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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